Instead of a sentimental Mother's Day column, I've decided to go the realistic route and broach a topic that is an everyday struggle for many of us.
Many moms feel like they don't measure up thanks to the age-old comparison conundrum that's now fueled by society, blogs and social media. All you moms know what I'm talking about. No matter what kind of mother we are or aren't, we can't do enough. We aren't enough. In honor and celebration of Mother's Day, please stop comparing yourself.
You are enough.
You are perfectly chosen for this role. You can meet the needs of the children you have been given. If you aren't a mother, look around - there are children around you to love. Children in your community, schools, churches and local clubs in need of your mentorship and love.
You are enough.
The journey to motherhood varies from the conventional means and fertility treatments to adopting an embryo or a child of any age. Maybe you're not a mother in the traditional sense but a stepmom, aunt or friend. Mother, one way or another or not at all, you are enough.
Regardless of your path, this Mother's Day don't allow your story to be less than what you think it should have been.
Your precious story is your own, unique and like no other.
All of our stories include struggles and ugly, awkward patches. I have friends whose stories involves brokenness. Others have been struck with tragedy and are still picking up the pieces after losing a child or even children. We all have joyous moments, the happiest of days and true miracles woven into the fabric of our unique stories.
In the days ahead, reach out to your friends and family members whose Mother's Day might not be filled with joy and happiness. Give them a call. Not a text or an email, but an actual phone call to chat with them. Listen. Share a favorite memory of them and their loved ones.
Stop by for a visit. This Mother's Day, there's a mother you know who feels like she's not measuring up. She has a fractured relationship with a child. She hasn't forgiven herself for her past actions. She mourns for the child she lost. She has little ones and is doing her best to provide for them but doesn't feel she is keeping up. Can you offer support? Can you love on her a little more?
Regardless of how you fit into the picture, you are enough to show her she is enough this Mother's Day. Oftentimes we wait for someone else to take the lead. Someone else will call her. Someone else will invite her over.
But should that someone be you? You are enough.
Strip away the titles and labels of what and who a mother should be. Love the mothers in your life. Meet a mother right where she is and love her.
In my 21 years as a mother, I don't have it all figured out and never will. I learn from those around me, from those who meet me where I am, who build me up, encourage me, listen to me and forgive me. I don't waste my time comparing. I've lowered my expectations. I love my kids more. I focus on what is best for my kids, and the rest of the details fall away or into place.
I am enough for my kids. They know me as their imperfect, messy mother who fervently loves them right where they are. Mother or not, you are enough this Mother's Day to love a little more and meet a mother right where she is.